Highly reliable sources are reporting that the death of Osama Bin Laden is entirely thanks to him owning an iPhone, allowing his location to be tracked. See how lethal could be this tracking function.
The sources also report that Steve Jobs had this to say on the topic:
Well, we finally got caught tracking people, and officials from the Pentagon approached us and said that we might just as well rat out Osama now as we have nothing left to hide. It’s just as well… That bastard jailbroke his iPhone anyways and wasn’t buying through iTunes.
Reportedly, officials at the Pentagon replied, “No comment,” when asked whether they would be killing more iPhone users.
Rumors are spreading confusion over Osama Bin Laden’s final words. Some sources report his final words as, “Should’ve got an Android”, while others report them as, “Should’ve got a Windows Mobile”. Other sources are saying his final words were simply.